The way people cling to the belief that a full-filled, pain-free life equals happiness actually diminishes their chances of ever attaining real happiness. If fun and pleasure are equated with happiness, then pain must be equated with unhappiness. But, in fact, the opposite is true: more times than not, things that lead to happiness involve some pain. As a result, many people avoid the very endeavors that are the source of true happiness. They fear the pain inevitably brought by such things as marriage, raising children, professional achievement, religious commitment, civic or charitable work, self-improvement. Ask a bachelor why he resists marriage even though he finds dating to be less and less satisfying. If he's honest, he will tell you that he is afraid of making a commitment. For commitment is in fact quite painful. The single life is filled with fun, adventure, excitement. Marriage has such moments, but they are not its most distinguishing features. Similarly, couples who choose not to have children are deciding in favor of painless fun over painful happiness. They can dine out whenever they feel like and sleep as late as they wish. Couples with infant children are lucky to get a whole night's sleep or a three-day vacation. I don't know any parent who would choose the word fun to describe raising children. Understanding and accepting that true happiness has nothing to do with fun is one of the most liberating realizations we ever come to. It liberates time: now we can devote more hours to activities that can genuinely increase our happiness. It liberates money: buy that new car or those fancy clothes that will do nothing to increase our happiness now seems pointless. And it liberates us from envy: we now understand that all those rich and glamorous people we were so sure are happy because they are always having so much fun actually may not be happy at all. The moment we understand that fun does not bring happiness, we begin to live differently. The effect can be, quite literally, life-transforming. According to the writer, people who think of happiness as fun ______.