A Forgiveness To forgive is a virtue, but no one has ever said it is easy. When someone has deeply hurt you, it can be extremely difficult to let go of your hate. However, forgiveness is possible, and it can be surprisingly beneficial to your physical and mental health. People who forgive show less sadness, anger and stress and more hopefulness, according to a recent research. 1 Try the following steps: Calm yourself. 2 You can take a couple of breaths and think of something that gives you pleasure: a beautiful scene in nature, or someone you love. Don’t wait for an apology. Many times the person who hurt you does not intend to apologize. They may have wanted to hurt you or they just don’t see things the same way. 3 Keep in mind that forgiveness does not necessarily mean becoming friends again with the person who upset you. Take the control away from your offender( 冒犯者 ). Rethinking about your hurt gives power to the person who causes you pain. Instead of focusing on your mounded( 半埋没的 ) feelings, learn to look for the love, beauty and kindness around you. 4 If you understand your offender, you may realize that he or she was acting out of unawareness, fear, and even love. You may want to write a letter to yourself from your offender’s point of view. Don’t forget to forgive yourself. 5 But it can rob you of your self-confidence if you don’t do it. A. Why should you forgive? B. How should you start to forgive? C. Recognize the benefits of forgiveness. D. Try to see things from you offender’s angle. E. For some people, forgiving themselves is the biggest challenge. F. To make your anger die away, try a simple stress management technique. G. If you wait for people to apologize, you could be waiting an awfully long time. B Life getting you down? Learn to bounce back " That which does not kill us makes us stronger. " Nietzsche said. There are a number of ways that can get us through tough times, help us to bounce back and make us happier. 1 Find something you can control. 2 But taking small, positive steps in any area of our life can have a ripple effect, enabling us to move forward in the problem area. 3 As a species, we tend to focus on what’s wrong rather than what’s right. But we can benefit a lot from paying attention to what’s going right. Psychologists have shown consciously focusing on these good things helps to increase our experience of positive emotions. Check your thinking. 4 Leading psychologist Martin Seligman found that the way we interpret the causes of everyday setbacks can have a significant impact on our ability to cope and our physical health. He also showed we can learn more resilient( 有弹性的 ) thinking styles. Distract yourself. When we are immersed in a problem, it is hard to think creatively about ways to deal with it. It often helps to take time out from the things you are worrying about. 5 Not only does this give us a break from what we’re doing and our worries, it’s also great for our minds. A. Always do something that is right. B. It’s true that there are lots of things we can’t control. C. An effective way of taking time out is exercise. D. Next time you are feeling stressed or stuck, give them a try. E. Focus on what’s right. F. Next time something goes wrong for you, pause for a moment. G. The way we think can destroy our own resilience.